New Life

By: Melody Mohnhaupt

 As you may know, Kenya and I recently got back from spending two weeks in the Philippines. My twin brother, Mark, lives there as a missionary with his beautiful wife, Clarizel, (our Philippines Becoming Esther Representative) and their two beautiful babies. Kenya’s father is also currently living in the Philippines. We knew this trip would be a great time to catch up with our loved ones. What we didn't know, is that we’d get so much more out of this trip than just that.

    This journey was my fourth to the Philippines, so, naturally, I was not expecting many new elements. On the outside, you could even say I didn't really experience anything new. Structurally it was pretty much the same as before, and yet, somehow, everything was different. The only thing I can possibly attribute this to, is my relationship with the Lord. When I think about where I am now vs. where my relationship with Jesus was on my last three trips, I know I am in a much different place. I feel that my spiritual maturity allowed for a completely new experience. Every conversation was spoken with a different outlook, each act of love was pure and genuine, each interaction was deeper than before. I was present, in the moment, aware, open, and even vulnerable. I heard; I think for the first time maybe. I was looking through a new lens. I was feeling with a different heart. It sounds funny. I can’t even really put it into words, but I know a big shift took place. 

      My previous trip, in 2015, set the tone for this one. On my very last day before flying back home, a woman that is known in our church as being a strong, spirit led, prophetess and prayer warrior pulled me aside and began weeping over me. I was completely caught off guard. She told me she was troubled in her heart about an issue concerning me and she wanted me to take it to the Lord in prayer. She discerned by the spirit that I had allowed myself to feel a certain way about people and situations in my life that was unpleasing to the Lord. I didn't express my emotions, but a part of me was upset and almost insulted that she brought these things up. I left with a little bit of a bitter taste in my mouth.

    I’ve had two years to take these issues to God, and thank God I did! It took me a while to come to grips with it, but she was right. I had a problem that I was letting harbor inside of me. Each day that I let pass without taking it to God would have only made that issue worse. For a while I was in denial. I didn't think I had any problems that I needed to work out. I told myself over and over that she didn't know what she was talking about. Thankfully, as time went on and a I allowed the Lord to break my pride, I was able to ask Him to help me with this issue.

    I purposed in my heart months before this trip to allow the Lord to work in me in this particular area. If I had gone to the Philippines this time around without letting Him deal with me, I feel like I would have missed out on so much. He knew my struggles, my fears, my insecurities, and he made a way for me. He changed the things in me that I brought before His throne in prayer. He humbled me. All those voices in me that wouldn't allow me to let go of the old baggage, were silenced. God even changed the circumstances around me to differ from my expectations. He had his way. And I’m glad I moved out of His way so that He could.

    I bet you weren't expecting this type of story, but, as personal and kind of random as this is, you must know the importance of this message. Sometimes we have issues. We don’t always like to admit it, but we do. And sometimes they are pretty gnarly. I am almost certain someone is reading this right now thinking, “No, this doesn't apply to me. I don’t have an issue.” But the longer you tell yourself that, the longer you will be doing yourself a disservice. God can’t deal with the issues in your heart until you admit that you have them. You will be crippling yourself spiritually until you do. Take some time to reflect and ask yourself some real, tough questions. Lay down your pride and let him clean house. 

    The Bible says that a little leaven leavens the whole lump. That applies to your personal spiritual life. When you have a little leaven inside of you, it spreads. It infects other areas, and it becomes more intense with time. The only way to get rid of it is to gut every last bit out. Don’t leave any behind, because it will grow back and fester again. The Lord wants to cleanse you. That leaven is holding you back. It is keeping you in bondage. It hurts you more than anyone else. Sometimes we think by holding onto certain things, it somehow vindicates us, but it actually does the opposite. It keeps God from vindicating us. 

    Let go. Allow yourself to be washed white. Time is too short to hold on to the things that are keeping you from a more abundant life with the Lord. Come clean. It’s so worth it! Believe me. It changes everything.

    I wasn't too happy to hear it at the time, and even now, it’s a little embarrassing to share, but I’m so thankful to the Lord for sending someone who loved me enough to tell me I was wrong. Someone who urged me to let God work in the areas I had no desire for Him to have His ways in. I’m a new woman because of it. He has blessed me because of it. I've been given new life. I am truly unworthy, but his grace is sufficient for me!

,Melody